Tuesday, December 30, 2008
I woke up sick this morning and my wonderful husband went out and fed the horses for me and urged me to go back to sleep. I did. I woke up at my leisure (7:00 a.m. cuz I'm not very good at the whole sleeping in thing) and got myself pulled together. I paid the bills and then took the kids to town for an appointment. Got my car washed, called my mom and came home.
This evening was wonderful because David and Brandilyn had mercy on a mom that wasn't feeling well and made dinner. It was a fabulous meal and then they proceeded to do the dishes while I dilly dallied on the computer for a spell.
As I look back on this day I can't recall any bickering or disagreeing of any of my family members. And, yes, Brian was in the mix for about an hour of the day. He seemed to be in a decent mood (of course, he had his friend up here and has been doing whatever he pleases all day).
Today, I read something that suggested that I write down everything that I am grateful for. The suggestion was to list 100 things in one day. At first this task seemed daunting but when I got into it, I was amazed at how quickly those little ditties added up. Yes, I have a lot of things to be grateful for.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
After the video presentation, the sister in our ward giving the lesson attempted to open up some discussion regarding the video we had just seen. She told about a personal experience of her's when she was diagnosed with cancer and then went on to say that possibly the reason for all these talks on hope (evidently the last General Conference had an underlying message of hope) was that we were about to face some really, really hard times and we needed to hear this.
Are you kidding me? We have been told that hard days were coming. We have been taught as long as I can remember and before, no doubt, that we need to prepare for hard days. "Get your food storage beefed (pardon the pun) up." "Prepare your families spiritually." "Pay off all your debt." So on, so on, so on.
Now, I'm not saying that all of this is not good cousel because it is! It most certainly is. The point I'm about to make is this . . . if we spend so much energy preparing for "hard times" then, yes, hard times are coming. They most certainly are! And how could they not? We think about it, we obsess about it, we expect it so it natually must happen. That is the law of the universe!!
I have another angle. How about we go against the grain and focus on good times. How about we focus on how wonderful the future is. What if we focus on abundance? Abundance of love, money, food, resources and health. What if we try to feel what that would be like? What if we close our eyes and imagine that it is here. Good times are ours to enjoy. "Man is that he may have joy." Right? Let's be joyful and positive and optimistic.
It's just a thought.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Did I have a good time? Well, uh, yeah I did. I enjoyed interacting with all my husband's family and our children and their families. It was great. I ate an insane amount of grub, opened an obscene amout of presents, spent an overwhelming amount of money, and fretted an awful lot over whether or not I purchased the "perfect" gift for everyone. In the end? Nobody really cares. My kids are happy with what they got - and would be happy with whatever it was they got.
So why do we do this crazy thing we call Christmas? Quite honestly there was no "Christ" in our Christmas this year. It was a lot of accumulation of "stuff". Stuff we don't need. Stuff we could all live without. So what really is this all about? It makes no sense to me and I think that if we pull ourselves out of the "moment" and look down upon the big picture we will all be amazed (and a bit ashamed) at the screwy culture we are living in.
Will I do this again next year? You can pretty much count on it. Will I get caught up in the commercialism that I hate so much? You can pretty much count on that too. Will I beat myself up on December 26th? No, not a chance of that one. What am I doing on the 26th of December this year? Well, it's like this . . .
I will get up, go for a run, take a yoga class and then come and spend the majority of my day putting all the decorations and Christmas evidence back into the storage container. I will then settle into my routine that I engage in for the other 11 months of the year. Yup, I will now re-enter the world of Jody Weltz. Jody Weltz the way that she usually is. The happy carefree, fun person that I usually am. Ahhhhhh, yes, welcome back life!!!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Well, something in me snapped that day. We had already, like I said earlier, informed the children that Christmas this year was going to be a lot less about the presents so that wasn't an issue. But, somehow, I have magically pulled the whole event together. I stand (sit) here right now completely finished with my shopping. Yup, finished, I tell you. It's a beautiful feeling.
And, guess what??? You can walk into our front room this year because there is a lot less presents. Yeah!!!!! I did good. I stuck to the plan. Christmas morning my husband will be so dog gone proud of me because of a few things. The first (and most obvious) is that the "bill" for the season will be substantially lower than in the past and second the wrapping ceremony will take a lot less time because there is a lot less presents!!!!
So now we focus on the reason for the season (so cliche). Yes, this is the time to reflect on the savior and all that he gave to all of us. He was the ultimate example of how we should mold our lives. I am grateful for him and I am grateful to have this time to ponder all that we have to be grateful for.
Monday, December 8, 2008
As we woke up this morning to a cool 45 degrees, we didn't give much thought to it other than to mutter about how cold it is getting. We buttoned up our jackets and braced ourselves for the frigid temperatures outside. Some of us who wear flipflops year round were mildly uncomfortable but we managed. The sweatshirts are all pulled out and ready to slip on as we prepare for our "layered" look for the long winter ahead.
Yes, Old Man Winter is knocking on our back door once again. Don't know if we are ready for him. The sun came out later today and we put our faces toward it just to feel the warmth on our faces. Ahh, yes, it was a little piece of heaven. But then, every day is heaven here in beautiful California.
Did we consider what it's like to wake up to white as it appears you do? Nah. Sorry but, nah. We enjoy our brownish greenish hills and the grasses waving in the wind. We do hope that you will enjoy your white Christmas. We've heard about such things but that's a Currier and Ives thing - you know, Christmas cards and such.
Thanks for the lovely letter. It was so filled with passion and emotion. You really do need to learn to deal with your anger. Perhaps one of our infamous yoga classes and a dish of curry tofu would help?
Thursday, December 4, 2008
We were right there in the middle of our yoga practice. Everything was humming along just great. There was the sound of sirens in the background but I really don't tune into that kind of thing when I'm in my practice. It's just there - not noticed. My teacher then brought it to our conscience attention. It was getting louder and louder and then it just stopped right outside the studio.
Four firemen jumped out and came to the door of the studio - right there in the middle of class! They started banging on the door and one of the women in class jumped up with her keys and unlocked the doors as they went running through our class. I couldn't believe it was happening! Who does that? That never happens!!!
Well, what had happened was that this elderly woman fell outside the studio on the parking lot side and her glasses broke with the glass sticking into her face. One of my fellow yogis is a firefighter and she was out there helping this poor woman. I guess the woman's face was cut pretty badly and she was bleeding quite a bit.
As we were focusing our attention back on our practice, one of the firemen had to come running through our class AGAIN to get something out of his truck that was still parked on the street side. My teacher, in all her wisdom, asked us to stop our practice and send some good energy toward the woman that was in trouble. We did as we were asked. When Julie (the firefighter yogi) came back to class, she told us that the woman suddenly had become sooooo calm. Hmm, where did that come from, I wonder??
The point is, is that while we were thinking of that woman, one of the other yogis in my class said, "Well, she's in good hands. She's got "our" Julie." That says it all. My yoga family. I love them and I love everything about my yoga practice. I am so grateful to belong to this wonderful yogic community and know that where ever I travel, I will have a family in the yoga community.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
My first thought was that we would walk by the paddocks and pet some of the horseys to take care of her horsey fix for the time being since it was soooo cold. We stopped at Zoe's place and I couldn't help myself - I put on her halter and we walked Zoe down to the barn for a little brushing and to let Ava help.
No, that wasn't enough for me. I guess I should have figured this out about myself by now. I decided to maybe let Ava sit on her back but before I knew it, my saddle and bridle were in place on the mare - don't quite know how that happened. Of course, I had to get on and quickly snatched my little granddaughter on board with me. She fit so snuggly and cute in the front of my saddle.
I was going to just walk around a little bit but then, before I knew it, we were on the trail to the top of our property. We went all the way up and came back to the barn. Thinking this was way more than a little 2 year old (almost) could possibly have hoped for, I went back to the barn feeling kind of disappointed but wanting to not overdo. Ava's little face fell when I lifted her off the horse and her little lip started to quiver. What was a grandma to do? I quickly scooped her back on board with me and we were off to the park for another couple of miles of riding.
I know, so who takes a little 2 year old out on a 1-1/2 hour horseback ride? Um, yeah, that would be me. And what kind of little girl can be happy sitting in the saddle with her grandma for that long? That's right, GRANDMA'S GIRL! OH YEAH!!!!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
This is Marley. We never asked for another cat (heaven knows we certainly have more that I have EVER wanted - I don't really care for cats and my husband absolutely loathes the creatures!).
But, nonetheless, Brandilyn found him abandoned in a warehouse in the freezing cold up in Idaho Falls and he was pretty near death. He was emaciated, dehydrated and had really infected eyes. Brandilyn, being the animal loving soul that she is (okay, she DOES get that from me) rescued the little guy going against all the rules of her landlord with regards to having pets.
When she came home from Idaho last year, Marley came with her. When she left for Idaho this year, Marley stayed home. He grew, and grew and grew. He grew in stature and he grew into our hearts (well mine).
This cat has the most "pussanality" of any cat I have ever known. He is smart - really smart and affectionate. For instance . . . when I'm sleeping at about 3:30 a.m. (this used to be Brandilyn's rise time, I think, when she worked at the USDA) he will jump on my bed and gently rub his paw under my nose. When I swat him away, he is persistent. When this doesn't yield the desired result, he jumps on my rocking chair making it go "click-clack, click-clack, click-clack". This will continue for a spell and if he still hasn't succeeded in pissing me off enough to roust me out of bed, he will then go to the door and bat at the spring making the "boooiiiiinnng" music to spring (pardon the pun) me out of bed. By then, I'm pretty annoyed and he finally has my attention. Brat!!!
But then there are the good times. Like when I'm getting dressed and he jumps on the island in our closet and rubs his head against mine. Oh, and when I'm doing laundry or cooking or getting my hair done that he meows and rubs and purrs. It just melts my heart. Of course, that's when I figure out that all he wants is to go outside so that he can stand at the glass door and meow to come back in. So, yeah, I guess it is all about him. Go figure.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
I was on Ellie and anyone who knows Ellie knows that it was a pretty wild ride. The mare loves to RUN! She seems to never tire. I am in awe at her athletic ability. We went on a trail that Dave and I had discovered while he was out here visiting and it was so magical to be out for 2-1/2 hours all by myself with my horse and two dogs (yes, Pierre went and he was DRAGGING when we got home, poor guy).
There is something so spiritual about being in the hills alone with your thoughts (of course, with Ellie it was a little difficult to concentrate too much on my thoughts - it was more like "whoa, whooooa!!!). But, the point is is that I am so able to focus on the positive wonderfulness of my life and what a gift I have been given to be living here in this place in this time. All I can say is, "Thank you Heavenly Father for all of my blessings!!"
So, if anyone wants to come and join me on a Sunday morning at 8:00 a.m. (Nancy was supposed to join me but she must have overslept or something), they are soooo welcome. I would love to share the magic of the hills on the back of one of my trusty steeds with you. But you have to promise to allow me to have my space to just drink in all the beauty and majesty of this beautiful earth we live in.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
They both wandered into my office to snoop at what I was doing on the computer (after all it IS the only video screen these two ever really see since we don't do TV or allow video games nor do they have cell phones (thank heavens)). After being annoyed about the 6th or 7th time, I shooed them both outside. "Go out and enjoy this beautiful afternoon", I said. Both kids rolled their eyes, stomped their feet and shuffled outside.
Okay, so we let 10 minutes pass at this point. They have both managed to wander in for "who knows what reason" and are lounging around in their rooms!!! No way! Shut up! I told them both to go outside and play and you would have thought I told them to go shoot their best friend! I'm totally blown away.
So now they are outside again, my appointment for the afternoon just pushed it back about an hour, so guess what!!?? I'm going outside to ride my horse (sorry Dave) and enjoy the afternoon wonderfulness! And, yes, I'm dragging those little lazy bums down to the barn with me! Sucks to be them!!!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Friday, November 7, 2008
Sunday, November 2, 2008
I took it to heart and started finding ways to "linger". I tried to linger over breakfast. I lingered at the barn - now that was a fun one for me. Cleaning my saddles and other tack, brushing my horse just a little longer and spending some time watering and caring for my plants. I enjoyed that a lot. I even lingered in the laundry room - who would've thought that? But, hey, you can linger anywhere!
So, this morning, the clock was turned back an hour - well, it was SUPPOSED to be turned back an hour. I had a feeling that my husband had forgotten to do that little task last night when he went to bed and I was right. Anyway, waking up to the light and knowing that I didn't HAVE to get with the program was a beautiful thing. I was able to linger in bed. And linger I did for quite an embarrasing amount of time. Finally, I could feel the energy coming from the paddocks and drug myself up to go feed my babies.
I then lingered over my computer and then lingered over breakfast then lingered in the shower and lingered so much that I was ALMOST late for church. The kids were like, "Hey Mom! We gotta get going. Should we just wait for you in the car?" I was yelling back, "I'm in the shower. It might take a few minutes!"
So then I got to church and slipped into my pew. After I was sure that everything was in order, I pulled out my journal and began to write. I was enjoying it so much that, well, you know what I did? Yup! I decided to linger during my entry. I lingered right on into the opening remarks, opening song and then it was time for opening prayer. Do you know what I did? Nope. You're wrong. I put down my journal until I heard "Amen" and then I picked it up again. I know, I know. Bad me but I couldn't resist.
I came home from church and made a pact with myself. I would be reasonable with my lingering. But, now that I have discovered this wonderful thing is that possible? Like giving up Diet Coke and all the other evils is that really possible? So, I did what every girl that loves to linger would do. I went to my computer and, yes I admit it, I lingered there until I could hear my husband coming in the door announcing that he had the missionaries with him to have dinner with us. Whoops! Somehow, I managed to pull that dinner off only to find myself lingering later at the computer posting my blog, playing on Facebook, checking out my eBay action and IMing my daughter, friend in Arizona and my son's girlfriend in Utah.
I gotta tell you - I LOVE this lingering thing! It's working out pretty well for me. But as for my family . . .
Friday, October 31, 2008
So, for me, rain means that I have to get up in the dark and cold, get dressed, shuffle out to the garage and get into my boots, don my jacket and head out into the rain and wind to feed my babies. My babies would all be equines for anyone who isn't aware of what makes me tick (duh). In the evening, it's the same story except I'm not quite so sleepy - just annoyed because I have to still cook dinner (which I so hate doing).
The rain also means something else (heh-heh). It means those evening when my lover and I give each other "that look" and sneak off into the hot tub outside of our bathroom on the deck. We sit out there, discuss mundane topics and allow the rain to drench our faces and the wind to whip our hair. We don't care because we are alone together and the warm water keeps our bodies from noticing the elements around us.
It also means that we lie in bed later and are allowed to listen to a love song being tapped out on our roof above our heads. My lover always knows what the rain does to me and he is eager to get the events of the evening under way. We hustle to get the kids to bed - reminding them of how "tired" they are and quickly scamper back to our end of the house and make the preparations for bedtime. Oh yes, these are my favorite evenings of all. All snuggled in by the one I love. It surely doesn't get much better than this!!!
So, now that it is time to go out and feed my horses, I head to the garage to don my gear. I always make the appropriate grumbles and groans so that my family "thinks" I am put out and performing a task that is sooooo undesirable. Secretly, I have a twinkle in my eye and a smirk fighting its way to my face because tonight . . .
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
On the bright side, I saw racks and racks of discounted clothing that were about Courtney's size. There were also numerous pairs of shoes. After she was out of school today, I picked her up and, since it was just "us girls", we scurried right on over there. It was so much fun to watch her try on several pairs of shoes and then again as she lit up when I told her she could have three pairs (the prices were really THAT low). We then bought her a jacket, underwear, socks and a sweatshirt. She was bouncing all over the place.
Then, in true Courtney spirit, I went over to the adult women's shoes and she got all excited as we found a cute pair that we just knew Brandilyn would love. She said, "Can we get these for her?". Of course, I can't resist spoiling my "Oboe Joboe" so we got them. It was also endearing when Courtney then started telling me how much she misses her older sister. Well, that got me going as well. I miss her so much it hurts!!! I'm so glad that I have good company.
Sometimes I find myself getting annoyed with constant chatter that comes out of Courtney's mouth that makes absolutely no sense at all. But, really, she is just a sweet little girl that loves lace, pink, purple, Hannah Montana, and all that frilly girlly stuff that drives me insane. It's not her fault she ended up with such a free spirited hippy for a mom but I guess that's the challenge we both have to face. How to coexist!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
I was out riding in the hills with Madisen who has been visiting me from Utah. We have had a great visit and capped it off with an awesome ride yesterday. We did Manzanita and went out around a great spot where we have a view of forever. As we were heading back to the barn it hit me, "this is the last run of the season." Don't know where that thought came from and I hope, certainly hope, that it's not.
My friend called me who has been "borrowing" one of our horses for the summer to ride and told me it was time to bring Cowboy home. She was getting ready for her fall stuff and wasn't going to have enough time to ride. We drove over to Danville and loaded him up and brought him home. It was his "last run of the season."
My sister got married two weeks ago. We planned her reception at my home this last Saturday. I had planned the reception to be indoors because of my experience with the disaster in August with Brandilyn's reception (the winds were horrible). The days leading up to my sister's big day were absolutely gorgeous so I went out on a limb and moved the event outdoors. It was fabulous. This morning when I woke up it was cold, windy and very foggy. I guess my sister's reception was out "last run of the season."
And so it goes. I look around me and feel the winds of change blowing everywhere. Do we need to be sad about these changes? About these doors that seem to be slowly creaking closed? Nope. I choose to look at these as opportunities to turn around and see where the next open door to slip through is that will lead to the next big adventure.
Because, you know what? Tomorrow I leave for Montana to take my final exam for Footzoning. I am very confident (not cocky) that I will pass this. I am fascinated by every facet of this new adventure in my life and I honestly feel that I have a purpose to serve others with this gift that I have been offered. So, there it is! The first run of my new season!!!
Thursday, October 16, 2008
This year HAS to be different. The economy has seen to that. So, what is a girl like me to do? I have fretted and fussed over the implications of "scaling down". So . . . I sat my kids down for Family Home Evening on Monday and informed them of the bad news. I was braced for all out mutiny.
What I received was understanding and, yes, even a little bit of sympathy for what I was feeling. I was so stunned! My kids were asked to write out their Christmas list and, instead of seeing the 3 page essays that I have in the past, I saw papers with only a few modest desires. I was so proud of my kids. I have always accused them of being a bunch of materialistic brats and they showed me, didn't they.
I am grateful that Heavenly Father has smiled down upon my little head at this moment. I am grateful that Brian actually said that Christmas was about Christ and not the presents. I am grateful that Robbie said "Mom, we don't need a bunch of stuff to be happy" and I am grateful that the twins only put a couple of modest requests on their list (okay, except for the ipod that Courtney asked for - she doesn't quite get it).
So, now, I need to start looking at the next few months and decide which direction I am really going to take in this Christmas thing. Can I really put more "Christ" into our Christmas this year? Is there someone out there that can give me a clue how to do that? Does that sound insanely crazy? Wow, I'm so overwhelmed by this whole concept that I think I need to go shopping! Maybe I will buy them a few extra presents because they are so wonderful . . .
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Skip, the twins and Robbie left early to go to the church for an activity tonight so that left me home alone. Brian arrived back from his ride shortly thereafter while I was out feeding the animals. When I got back up to the house and had settled down on the computer for some "down time", Brian came into my office and announced that he had lost his wallet out on the trail. It was now about 6:00 in the evening.
I jumped into action without taking any thought to what the time was. I threw on my boots and hurried down to grab my horse, Mosca, and tack him up. Brian was right behind me with Zoe. I never threw a horse together so fast in my life. I left the barn at a gallop and headed for the park. I waited there for Brian who was just a few beats behind me (Zoe is fat, old and extremely out of shape - Mosca is young and pretty athletic).
At the park we made a game plan. Since he had ridden on the Manzanita trail, which is a very steep loop trail, we decided to split up and go different directions. With the younger horse I would be able to cover more trail in a shorter period of time. David Haynes, you would have paid big bucks for this opportunity!!! I galloped pretty much most of the trail and was able to find the fated wallet at the bottom of the Manzanita trail (of course). I then finished the trail and never intersected Brian. I was beginning to wonder if a) something had happened bad to him and/or Zoe or b) he had gone a different way. Either one wasn't a good sign.
I went for a little bit further then decided to turn around and go back out to see if I could find Brian. I went all the way back to the Manzanita Trail and saw the top of his white hat as he was heading back down. I called for him and he turned around (lucky for Zoe). He walked up to me and I asked if he had found his wallet. His face fell as he realized that I didn't have it (I couldn't resist). I then let a large grin envelope my face as I produced the wallet. He was elated and I told him I thought he was the luckiest son-of-a-gun alive.
We headed back slowly as Zoe was exhausted (Dave, you can relate to this, right?). We were able to observe and enjoy the beautiful full moon on the dark crisp night. We ambled slowly back and arrived back at our place about 7:30. We were both in great spirits.
There is nothing like the "the thrill of the hunt" - especially when you get to do it on the back of a horse. Thank you, Brian, for another wonderful adventure for me to blog about. It was one of the funnest nights I have had in a long time. I will never forget these wonderful times. I love you, buddy, and am grateful that prayers always get answered - sometimes the way we really want them to, to boot!
I have always thought of the twins as just content to sit around in their rooms and do nothing. Well, nothing in my opinion. Jacob likes to play with his Legos or obsess about his Matchbox cars - put them in rows by color and style or whatever. At any rate, when I'm at the barn they are usually up in their rooms doing whatever it is that they do.
Yesterday, however, was different. I was tacking up my horse to ride and I heard, "Mom, what are you doing?" I turned around to find Jacob riding down to see me on his scooter. Wow! What a surprise. I'll take it! He then asked if he could ride a horse too. That took me back but then I heard myself say, "Yeah, let's go get Zoe for you to ride."
His little face was beaming as he was trying to lead her down to the barn. He was a little intimidated by such a large animal but was eager to help brush her and asked a tone of questions about the different pieces of tack I was putting on her. He wasn't even scared when I hoisted him up and into the saddle and handed him the reins. I have to tell you, he did pretty good! I had to get on him a little bit about how to do a few things. I wish I had a picture to show about how he had the reins up around his ears as he was trying to make Zoe stop or slow down.
After a bit, we went on a "tour". We left the arena and walked around the place. I was on Mosca and he was on Zoe. There was one little spot where Zoe decided to take off at a fast trot and Jacob became a little panicked. I loped up and grabbed his reins and got the mare under control. He tootled around with me for about 45 minutes. I was so dog gone proud of him!!!
So, is this another shot at having a riding partner? I don't know but I will ride this one out!! For now, you can find me in the barn cleaning tack or getting one of my horse ready with a new little sidekick - Jacob!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
I went into Walmart today in search of the product that was selected. I was standing at the display at the store when a friend of mine happened to see me. She then joined me in my search and decision of which package of rubbers to purchase for this project. We were laughing and vascillating between several different options in the rubber selection.
An elderly woman happend to cruise by riding in her electric cart. She must have overheard our conversation because she quipped, "Better safe than sorry, sweetie." I then smiled and shot back, "Oh, they're not for me - they're for my son." She gave me the oddest look and then my friend chimed in with "Oh, Jody, that sounded really bad." I paused, thought, and then we both busted laughing hysterically.
Okay, so my son's presentation project is in poor taste (as my husband will say) but, heck, it sure makes a funny story! I mean, really, how many moms get to have this much fun with their teenagers?
I came home and said, "Hey, Brian, your rubbers are in the car!"
He said, "Hey, thanks Mom" as he went out to get them. He came walking into the house and said, "Cool, this one has a vibrating ring! This one is a pleasure pack of four! Wow, this is great. It's just what I need."
Yes, I'm the "cool" mom!!!
Monday, October 6, 2008
Okay, so last night Sarah came over for dinner and brought Ava. She is about 1-1/2 now and is walking and talking up a storm. I was riding Zoe in the arena when she pulled up and I asked if Ava could ride with me. Sarah let her and it was so awesome to watch Ava go from being scared and crying to actually talking and interacting with me. We rode up the hill to see Poppa and she was excited to show Grandpa how she was riding the horsey.
The same thing with Allie. When I visited Shauna Leigh about a month ago, I was able to interact and enjoy Allie. She played with me and actually wanted me to read to her. It meant a lot.
I guess the deal is that I don't care for babies at all. I don't want to be this way and, now that I look back, I think I was a little bit that way with my own (oh my, is this what the problem with them is?). Is that okay to admit that I'm not a baby nut? I see all these other grandmas cooing and fussing over the babies and I'm just kind of keeping my distance and smiling politely to the mom.
Bottom line - please be patient with me. I will be your teenager's best friend. I will be the fun grandma (Granny Jo) once they are out of diapers. Until then, take good care of them for me, please.
Okay, now that Ava Grace and Allie are starting to get fun (that would be in my opinion, of course) I need to put on my play clothes and get ready to have some real Grandma Fun! Bring it on, girls!!!!
Friday, October 3, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
Since I just got home from 3 very intense days of lecture and testing on Footzoning, I was defintely lost in thought. I was making sure that I could call up all the information that I had received over the last bit. My mind was working overtime.
Out of nowhere, I heard another human voice, a male, who said "Sorry, I didn't mean to intrude on your space." I was startled and jumped at the sound of his voice. He was a runner out for an early morning run. I smiled at him and he commented on how nice it is to be out here alone in the hills with a lots of solitude. I couldn't have agreed more. How nice of him to apologize for intruding on my space. How awesome that he would even recognize that I was there to be "alone" with my horse, dog and thoughts.
I ended up taking a trail that my daughter, Brandilyn, would be happy if she never saw again for the rest of her life. It is called the Manzanita Trail and it is my favorite of all the trails in the park. It goes straight down for quite a ways and runs along a creek for a bit before it takes off and heads straight back up again. My horse was full of spirit and seemed up for the challenge.
I often vascilate as to whether or not it is appropriate for me to be out riding my horse early on a Sunday morning. My argument for the affirmative would be that I am able to meditate and appreciate this beautiful world that Heavenly Father has created for us. I am also able to focus on the things that I am so grateful for. It is so easy when it is spread out in front of me in a way such as this.
I look forward to Brandilyn and Dave coming here for a visit. Dave is, hands down, my favorite trail riding partner. He loves the adventure and hears the call of the hills just as I do. I am hoping that Dave has been studying his map for a new adventure for us to go on. We got in a lot of trouble from Skip and Brandilyn last time we went but we promise to be a little more responsible this next time. Maybe they will go with us???
So, until next Sunday, I will have the memories of this ride and the anticipation of another trail riding adventure to keep me alive. After all, there are few things in this world that make me feel as "alive" as when I am bonding with these magestic creatures that we call horses.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Personally, at this moment,
I have no idea how old I am.
I do remember a few milestone birthdays -
You know, 18, 21, 40 . . .
But in my head, nothing ever changed.
I keep wondering
When everyone is going to catch on
To the fact that for the last thirty years
I've been masquerading as an adult.
Perhaps we are, like the old saying goes,
"Only as old as we feel."
In that case,
I'll stay lost in my bewilderment . . .
'Cause really, life is what we make it, and
Age is nothing but a state of mind.
This is totally me! I must be about 17 or 18 years old, I guess. Yes, I have been masquerading as an adult and, actually, I think everybody that knows me well knows that I have been. I am trapped in a body that is much older than my mind. Heck, my 19 year old daughter is much older than I am.
I have heard that our souls are at different levels of progression. My soul is a very young soul and Brandilyn, Skip and Robbie all have much more mature and older souls. Brian and I are stuck in this teenager stage. I, personally, love it. It suits me. I NEVER want to grow up and I won't! So, Brian, let's rock on!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
I decided to meditate on this idea for a bit and realized that it isn't just the physical, although that is a great start. Letting go of the tightened muscles immediately releases the areas we are trying to target at any given time. That in and of itself was an amazing discovery for me.
I, then, explored other areas of my "universe" and realized that, wow, this is HUGE! If there was someway that I could let go of the chatter (or chitra in my yoga world) in my mind, I was able to access the areas that held vast amounts of information that I have taken in over the years. I have been so numbed by the constant flow of "chitra" that I have always thought I had no "memory" capabilities!
So, here I am, off to Vegas to commence my testing for Footzoning. I want to be able to do this Footzoning so bad but was struggling with retaining the mountains of information that are required for certification. Now, with my new secret super power, I am able to tap into the information that I have been taking in these past few months. We will see how this new power works.
Goodbye chitra! Hello smart me! Wish me luck as I "let go"!
Saturday, September 20, 2008
I grew up in a home where we had no extended family. My dad (who didn't live with us) was an only child and my mother, who was born and raised in England had no family around except her brother who we didn't really interact with until I was well into my high school years. There were no grandparents, uncles, aunts or cousins in my upbringing.
Last year, Skip's whole family, with the exception of Taylor in Curt's family and Keith's whole family, were able to go on a Mexico cruise together. On one particular day, we all went out on an excursion while Skip's dad stayed on the ship with Courtney and Jacob. We went on a tour of the city of Mazatlan (I think that was where it was) and spent the whole day out and about. We saw a whole different side of Grandma. She was funny and really seemed to be trying to "kick it" with all of us - kids and grandkids. She had us all laughing.
I have never known that kind of family bonding before in my life. I loved it. Anyway, we took this picture overlooking the city at the beginning of our day and it will always serve as a sweet reminder of the kind of grandma I want to be - fun, loving, and not afraid to show my true colors!
Friday, September 19, 2008
Thursday, September 18, 2008
As I sit here at my computer enjoying my guilty indulgence, I have to ponder . . . am I wrong in keeping this decadence to myself? Can this relate to other aspects of my life? Do I keep what is good to myself and not share it? Does this make me a self centered and selfish individual? On some levels the answer would be yes. But then there is always the question of what my obnoxious teenage boys would do to my little stash of heaven. So when that little fact is thrown into my equation, I have to rethink my answer.
So . . . YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! I am selfish and self-centered and I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it! I LOVE BEING SELFISH. I LOVE BEING SELF-CENTERED! I will NEVER, NEVER, NEVER share my jam. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever!
Oh, sorry, I got carried away. Was this really about a English muffin and jam?
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
To think that maybe a year from now I COULD actually be certified to do Footzoning is pretty exciting. I really am anxious to get all this "textbook" stuff behind me and actually start fondling feet (I know, who would have thought . . .). To be even close to the level that my coach, Lezlie, is a worthy goal I have.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
It made me reflect on how grateful I am for a loving Heavenly Father that has created this beautiful place for us to live and grow in. I am grateful for the power of prayer and for the gift of personal revelation. For example: Yesterday I was in Brian's face (a little) about going on a mission. I was giving him the usual talk about how we would finance his education after he serves a mission. He was going back and forth with me and jibbering about how it will ruin his life, etc. At any rate, I got this very strong impression that I needed to shut my mouth - it was all in the Lord's hands. I haven't mentioned the subject since to him. He has approached it a little but I just keep my mouth shut. I trust that my Heavenly Father is mindful of him and will send him promptings where they are needed and will be heeded.
I am also grateful for this little period of time where I am given a "break". It was funny but while I was running (as I always do) I try to ponder the things that are weighing on me and often am inspired of what direction I should go to resolve the problem. Today, the only thing that I could think of was Brian and his life direction and I, again, got the gentle hand on my shoulder telling me, "Daughter, don't worry, it's in my hands."
Hence, I couldn't come up with something else to worry about. Tsk, tsk, what a day - nothing to worry about. I guess I will go out and enjoy this beautiful earth and life that is a gift from above! After all, it's all in the Lord's hands, right?
Friday, September 12, 2008
I am looking forward to my new calling and commit do magnify it to the best of my ability. I realize I have limitations - we all do - but I will work on my strengths and overcome those challenges. I am looking forward to having a positive influence in my son's life and, hopefully, be one of the ones that help him decide to serve a two year mission for our church.
I know that Brian will be an awesome missionary. He has the most charismatic personality and will wow people like no other. I know that people will be drawn to him and desire to have what he has. Yes, I know the Lord will prevail in the end and I'm looking forward to not only watching, but participating in the show!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Anway, I was then extended a new calling that really took the wind out of my sails. It was teaching Sunday School to the 16-17 year olds. Yes, I have been hitting my knees hard lately praying for my son (17 years old) and then the answer I get is to be his Sunday School teacher? Are you frickin' kidding me?? I don't think so. I burst into tears and haven't spoken much to my husband since.
You see, Skip is always put into a position of power over me. At work and at church. I feel that he has the "Oh, Jode can just do that" attitude regarding me. I resent it. For now, I am declining the call. I want to talk to the bishop and go to the temple. I honestly feel that someone else would be better suited for that calling. Someone who could make a difference in my son's life and maybe influence him for good.
Brandilyn says that I am pouting. Yes, that is true. The thought of being the teacher of the most unruly group in our ward is daunting but I can handle that. Don't want to but could do it. I promise, Brandilyn, that if I get a positive answer after sitting in the Celestial Room I will accept the call and magnify it to the best of my ability. It just doesn't feel right. Even after a night's sleep.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Funny thing is that in stake conference this weekend, that is exactly what President Alexander counseled all of us to do. He said that if there was anything that was preventing our family from doing scripture study, family prayer and FHE then we needed to reevaluate those activities - there are plenty of good things but then there are better things we could and should be doing. In addition, we were also informed that we should be doing our personal prayer and scripture study. I felt that this was an answer to my prayer.