Sunday, July 31, 2011

Kamikaze Son

We are up in Washington visiting my sister and mom. We traveled up here on Friday and are staying at my sister's house. The weather here is so perfect for Brandilyn's liking but my Dad and I are such warm weather creatures we are having a bit of a challenge adapting. But other than that, the break from life and the opportunity to spend quality time with my parents and one of my sibs is awesome.

This morning I decided that I needed a run. I just get so keyed up and out of sorts that I just need to go run it out. Unfortunately, Jacob decided that waking up at 6:30 a.m. was a good idea . . . whatever. I asked him to go back to bed. My sister was leaving for work and then I thought about it. Um . . . Jacob awake loose in my sister's house while I'm out getting my zen on. Yeah, bad, bad idea. I went back into the room and asked him to get dressed and ride his bike with me. He was more than happy to oblige.

We took off and he seemed to be enjoying himself. He left me alone to think which is my favorite thing to do while I'm running. (I'm one of those that HATE listening to music. I LOVE my thoughts). At the half-way point, Jacob wiped out and did a total body plant on the asphalt. He started crying (howling) and I told him to buck up and get back on his bike. He pulled it together and complied (I noticed that he was doing a lot of checking out of his wounds - I, being the stellar mom, chose to ignore it).

A bit later, I noticed that Jacob was quite a bit behind me. I turned around to see if he was okay and noticed that he was picking some random berries and eating them. I yelled for him to stop and catch up. Now I was a bit concerned. I had NO idea what the flip these berries were. I called my sister when I got home and asked and she indicated that she was pretty sure they were Oregon Grapes (something I don't see where I'm from) and that they were okay. I'm supposed to identify the plant when I get over there in a bit.

Anyway, back here at my sister's house, I finally looked down at Jacob's leg and noticed that his shorts were really blood soaked. OMG! Yeah, I'm SO up for the mother-of-the-year award. I dug through Gail's stuff and found some spray and antiseptic stuff to hold him over. Gotta make a store run again and get some supplies to patch that boy of mine up. He's not dead or sick from eating the suspicious berries so I'm guessing they were the "good" berries.

What a way to start my day, lol. That BOY!!!!

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Blue No Glue

It's kind of ironic. I spent a lot of years standing on the side of the ring watching my children show their horses through the years. Brian, Brandilyn and Robbie have all been extremely talented riders. They have won a LOT of ribbons and awards and we have spent a LOT of money on horses, shows, lessons, training etc etc etc. It has been a lot of fun and I have enjoyed it immensely.

However, in the background, has been their mother. I have ridden since I was four (I think I've mentioned that before). My mom was an awesome teacher and she was way more patient with me than I have ever been with my children when it has come to teaching things of this nature. I decided, about 14 years ago, to take formal lessons just so that I could ride with my babies. I have continued taking lessons. I even competed in a schooling show that turned into a complete disaster about 12 years ago and vowed to NEVER show again.

We once had a gorgeous horse that we bought for Brandilyn. He was a complete neurotic horse and freaked out when a horse was coming in the opposite direction as he. We ended up trading him for this big black quarter horse. I was disappointed and didn't know what I would do with this other animal we had just acquired. I had trials with him (I got thrown off, he took off and removed one of my fingers which turned into a medical nightmare etc.) I hated him. One day, about four years ago, my trainer convinced me to take lessons on him and I reluctantly complied. That was and is my beloved Black Horse.

Last weekend my trainer talked me into showing . . . again. I was like, "IIIrrreeeeene, I'm scared of being embarrassed and doing awful!" She gently explained that a lot of years have passed and that I was much better and I should do fine. I was terrified but did it anyway.

I have to say the day was an incredible surprise! I competed in eight classes. I took home SEVEN blue ribbons and one red!! Are you kidding me? I was so proud of my big black wonder. Every time they announced the winner of a class I was completely caught off guard when they called my number.

The only thing missing in my wonderful experience was a member of my family standing at the gate and saying, "Good job. I'm so proud of you." I imagined it to be Brandilyn, though, and it made it all perfect.

We have all, over the years, had a funny saying at the horse shows: Blue or Glue (meaning he's off to the glue factory if he doesn't bring home the magic, lol). Well, my baby is DEFINITELY here to stay . . . for now.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Five and A Half Hours

Last Tuesday was a rough day - to say the least. I got woke up at 3:00 a.m. by my son requesting that I pick him up in town where he was visiting with the local peace officers (you know, kickin it and enjoying coffee and donuts) and taking a tour of the police station. Charming.

By the time I got home it was 5:00 a.m. and I decided that I should just stay up and start my wonderful day. I discovered we had no water at the house because of a broken pipe. Skip called the pipe fixing guy and that problem was solved sometime later. Turned out to be not the biggest train crash of my life.

My visiting teachers showed up around 1:30 ish and I was SO relieved (but in the back of my mind I KNEW that things in my life just seem to happen in 3's so I was on guard). We visited for quite awhile (I had a lot to say). The twins kept interupting so I asked them to please go outside and play. They did. My VT's left around 3:00 (like I said, I had a LOT to say, lol).

Courtney came in sometime later and announced that she couldn't find Jacob. I told her to go look again - dismissing her frustration (my bad). After another 1/2 hour she announced, once again, that she couldn't find Jacob. I decided to go out and help her out. After about two hours I started to panic a bit. I called my resourceful neighbor and she came over to help as well. She finally told me she was going to go saddle up a horse and we put in a call to 911.

I continued to search (we live in a wilderness area so the terrain is pretty rough in places and dangerous to say the least). The fire department showed up to get details, description etc. from me. Thank heavens Courtney was there. She was able to accurately describe what Jacob looked like, what he was wearing and where he was playing before she couldn't find him anymore. I was pretty impressed. My neighbor showed up on her horse and took off into the hills to search where vehicles can't access.

I came into the house and tried to call my bestie. I needed emotional support because I could feel myself slipping fast. She wasn't available so I called my VT, Brenda. She dropped everything and her and her husband quickly drove to our ranch.

After 5-1/2 hours of Jacob being gone, I heard the words I was desperately aching to hear, "I've got him!!" Jacob was alive and well. The search was terminated.

My neighbor had found him about two miles from our place, out in the hills wandering around lost. He had wandered out there (still don't even have a clue what went through his mind to motivate this activity), climbed up in a tree and had gotten stuck, heard me calling his name but chose not to respond, managed to get out of the tree without breaking anything and was standing in a clearing looking dazed and confused when she found him.

I am grateful that Jacob is ok. I'm grateful for all the people that rallied around to help me find my son. I am SO grateful that #3 came and passed and everyone is ok. I am really trying to find a place in my heart that can understand his random train of thought that led to all of this (just for the record, he didn't "run away" this time).

Right now, though, I'm glad to know that all is well.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Low, low, low

Caution: I'm about to get a wee bit spiritual. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Actually, there's NOTHING wrong with it. It's pretty right. And, because it's Sunday, I guess it would make it pretty appropriate, lol.

In the Book of Mormon there is a spot where the people were exceedingly wicked - actually there is a LOT of spots where the people were exceedingly wicked. However, the part I was reading recently is in the actual book of Mormon. The people had continued to become more and more wicked and then they were getting their tails whooped by the Lamanites, they were humbled and started to listen, somewhat, to the prophets and repent. Mormon wrote these words . . .
"and it came to pass that when I, Mormon, saw their lamentation and their mourning and their sorrow before the Lord, my heart did begin to rejoice within me, knowing the mercies and the long-suffering of the Lord, therefore supposing that he would be merciful unto them that they would again become a righteous people." (Mormon 2:12)

I, as a mother, am feeling this same joy in my heart. It has been very difficult to watch one of my children in particular spiral downward rapidly. I have finally pulled away from helping him out of the difficult situations he gets himself into. He has hit a new low recently and called me sobbing. After a lot of conversation last night, I put his dad on the phone. My husband counseled our son to go to church today (which he did), meet with his bishop (which he did) and commence the repentance process (which he says he's going to).

I know my son has a very long road ahead of him. He has a lot of really difficult consequences to deal with for his rogue actions and we will love him through every minute of it - not fix the problem or pay his way - just love him (which is a new concept for me).

I am grateful that we have the church and that there is help for us. I'm grateful that my son has finally reached the point where he is open to help from above. I'm grateful that we have a loving, forgiving Heavenly Father who is there for us and loves us unconditionally. I feel a lot of joy in my heart right now and I'm grateful for that too.

Saturday, July 2, 2011

EXTREME Pissedoffedness

Courtney just got home from a week at Girl's Camp. Yay her! I'm guessing she had a great time although I'm not home to hear all her wonderful stories of her spiritual fun-filled week.

However, there is just one thing that has me so dang heated up that I'm having a bit of trouble getting passed it. Evidentaly Danielle (who picked up Courtney from the drop off point) was informed that Courtney had trouble breathing at camp and they gave her, not one, but TWO breathing treatments with Albuterol. Wtf?

The Health Form that I was required to fill out specifically asks what meds are allowed to be administered to my child and I indicated NONE. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a "no meds" mom. I prefer herbs and only really seek the medical community when there are broken bones or life threatening situations. Furthermore, NO attempt was made to contact me for permission or advice on my child.

I know that Courtney does NOT have asthma. She does have trouble breathing when she gets amped up or has a cold and we just have her sit calmly until it passes. It always does. No way would I EVER give her medication/poison to alter what her body can and does do all by itself. Why would ANYONE make the choice to medicate another person's child with no permission. Isn't that illegal? I'm dang sure it is and I fully intend to address the problem

As for next year? Yeah, sorry church. My child will NOT be attending camp unless I'm there and THAT is highly unlikely.