Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Lil Ol Granny

At this moment and time I feel pretty blessed. My daughter is pregnant with our second grand baby, my boy is about to leave for college in Santa Barbara to pursue the career of his dreams, my other son is getting ready to move out and experience the joy of being on his own and I'm about to have a fairly quiet home. Just the twins, Danielle and Jeff and myself. Of course, there will be the occasional visit from Skip one or two weekends a month.

I think I'm going to enjoy this new change quite a bit. The boys will both be close enough (3 hours for one and 5 hours for the other) that they can come home and have Mom do laundry and make a bit of a fuss over them but yet they can live their life and reap the rewards of their choices.

As for that grand baby . . . well, I'm (yeah, the baby scrooge) actually beginning to get a bit excited. I LOVE to talk to Brandilyn and hear how she's doing. She's so dang cute about the changes her body is going through and I love to hear how her man is just as excited as her.

Yep, my babies are growing up and life is making a pretty sweet change. I'm looking forward to chillin in my rocking chair and waiting for the Sunday phone calls, gray hair and all!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011


Everything is already okay.

That right there has been my mantra today. I went out visiting teaching and our instrucitons for the message of the month was to make up our own message. My companion informed me of that in a text message that I read as I was getting in my car to drive from my yoga practice to my first appointment. She then said, "Dang, I suck at that kind of thing." Well, my dear, you have me as a companion and I rock at that kind of thing. So I guess that's what makes us uber awesome companions.

So I shared with my peeps that our message of the month was about gratitude. Not necessarily gratitude about all the wonderful stuff that we always express gratitude about but that we should be grateful for the hard stuff in our life. The hard stuff is where we learn. How many times have you EVER learned from having stuff easy? Really? Yeah, so there's the rub. Because we are loved and looked after and "everything is already okay."

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and all we have is this moment in time. Be grateful for this moment and find the hidden nugget that is there for us to learn from. Each breath is a gift. Each moment is a gift. And . . .


Dog (Not)Gone

I took my dog to the vet today to be put down. I was dreading this for the last week or so. Last night I brought her in and made a big fuss over her. This morning I brushed her and loved on her. It was really odd that she had NO idea what was going on. All she knew was that I was extra loving and tender with her.

Holly was adopted by our family about 8 or 9 years ago. She's always been a bit odd but we've just accepted her as "Holly Bear". Robbie picked her out at the pet store where they were having their Pet Adoption Day thing because I had accidentally killed his other dog and felt horrible about my crimes. She was obviously older than they informed us because she has progressively gotten to the point where she just kind of hobbles around. I let her sleep in my room every night where it's warm so that her bones don't ache.

So, anything and everything went wrong on my way to the vet. My son took my truck and never came back so I had to take Old Blue. I ran out of gas half way down the hill and was fit to be tied (with two dogs in the truck). Fortunately, Robbie met me as he was headed up the hill and we traded vehicles (he can figure out the no gas thing). I made it to the vet about 10 minutes late. They took us anyway.

The vet came in and examined my poor old dog. She said that my dog was happy when I was around and wagged her tail. As long as she could get up and take herself outside to releive herself and seemed to be happy to be around me then she should just have some pain meds to ease the discomfort. Okay . . .

So I guess the emotional investment I made into having to put my dog down was for naught. She's snorning happily beside me as I write this. What will happen tomorrow, next week or even next year is still a mystery. Tonight my dog is still here. The end.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Cleanse Schmlense

I think I'm really over it . . . finally!

I have done so many cleanses and I'm just down right sick to death of them! I started yet another one last night after our final performance (the drill team) and lasted until about 3:00 p.m. today. I was supposed to go until tomorrow night. I was feeling so sick and weak that I said, "to heck with this!" and went ahead and broke the fast.

So, does this make me a weenie? Do I just lack will power? I don't really think so. I actually did a cleanse where I ate nothing for 10 days straight and after the first 3-4 days I felt fine. I know that I CAN do it . . . I just don't WANT to do it.

Furthermore, I'm cranky and it's not fair to my family plus I have a client tomorrow and that just wouldn't be fair to her for me to show up not feeling 100%. Right? Never mind. I'm probably just trying to justify eating. Let's just face the truth, I just freaking LOVE food and I'm not designed to be skinny Barbie.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Cool, Clear Water

Brian hosted a hot tub party with some friends the other night. No big deal. He asked. I said "no probs" and life was good.

Yesterday we had a hurricane of a wind storm. I'm pretty sure the winds topped 80+ mph. It was pretty wild. Actually, I was hanging laundry out on the line and it was drying in 20 minutes or less. Pretty amazing. By the end of the day, when the winds were at their worst, I had hung out two comforters and they had flown off the line and almost took me out.

Today, it was as calm as could be. Calm and warm. I had 45 minutes before the next event and went outside to sit in the sun and enjoy. As I was sitting, I couldn't help but notice the pool equipment was making a very peculiar noise. I tried to pretend I couldn't hear it for awhile then decided I needed to get up and investigate.

I stood up and walked toward the pool and could NOT believe what I saw. Brian, my darling son, had neglected to cover the pool and spa when he was finished. Our entire pool was completely covered in pine needles, tumble weed and various other large weeds. Holy cow!! Furthermore, the water level was so low that the pump was sucking air. As if all of that wasn't bad enough, the key that operates the automatic cover had been left in the key slot and had blown away. Right on.

I was hoppin mad! I had no idea how to turn on the pool water. I had no idea where the flipping key was and I had no idea how I was going to begin cleaning up this ginormous mess! I went downstairs and knocked on Brian's door and proceeded to say, "Some dip wad left the damn pool cover off and now it's full of weeds and the water level is low and I don't know how to turn it on and the key is gone!" He looked at me and said, "Sorry. That was me. I'll fix it." Right.

He went back into his cave and thought that was that. NOT!! We have a situation here, people! I searched and searched and found the flipping key. I got out that thingy that scoops up crud and cleaned up a LOT of crud. I twisted this and turned that and finally found the right knobule that made the magical water start flowing into my doomed pool. Things were happening!

Well, long story long, I kind of cleaned up the excessive mess. I filled the pool with water and the key is safely back in its spot where it belongs. My boy will have the lovely task of finishing the job and making our pool the thing of beauty it was designed to be tomorrow morning. Go me!

Passer Outer

Forever and six days I have always known that my sister passes out when things get rough for her. I've stood behind her when she passed out while getting in trouble by Mom when we were younger. Actually, that was my first experience. We were both getting the what for and Tam was standing in front of me. My mom yelled, "Grab her she's passing out!" Sure enough my sister collapsed in my arms.

Over the years, there have been numerous other times where she has passed out on me. While I was taking a sliver out of her hand. While I was bandaging up a wound she had. Those kind of things.

It appears that I have a daughter with the same issue. One day, not that long ago, Courtney was pretty sick and throwing up. I was wiping her forehead with a cool cloth and holding her and suddenly her head went limp as a noodle and started falling toward the toilet. Fortunately, I caught it soon enough so that she didn't hit. Okay, Mom is on alert. We have a passer outer.

A couple of days ago on the way to school she mentioned something about a sliver in her hand. I told her I would help her with it when we were home. I couldn't deal with it on the way to school. I also reminded her that I forget most things so she would have to remind me later. She acknowledged that. This morning, as we were loading up in the car she mentioned the sliver again. Dang! I forgot to deal with that. We need to snag it when we get home. Of course, I forgot and she didn't remind me.

Tonight she's taking her shower. I'm preparing dinner. I call the kids and let them know it's dinner time and put the food out on the counter. Jacob, of course, is right on cue. "Where's your sister?" I inquire.

"She's sleeping in the shower." Right. I give him a dirty look and head to the bathroom to give Courtney a piece of my mind for taking so dog gone long in the shower. I mean, really? Come on, girl.

Sure enough, she's completely out cold on the floor of the shower. He face is a grayish color and I instantly launch into "Oh Shit" mode (sorry but that's the only phrase that describes my panic). I'm yelling, "Courtney! Courtney!" and slowly she opens her eyes and looks at me. "Get up! Are you okay? What's going on??"

She gets out and towels off and slowly gets dressed. She explains to me that while she was showering she was digging in her hand to get the pesky sliver out and everything started getting dizzy. She sat down and doesn't remember the rest. Holy crap!

So . . . yeah . . . another notch in my Mother-of-the-Year Award.

The Joy of Sox

Jacob is a little odd. I accept that. It's just who he is and we all love him. Jacob also has OCD to the umpteenth degree. He can sit for hours and hours playing with matchbox cars. Organizing them by color, size, model, etc. He also can sit for hours and hours organizing his Pokeman cards. It kind of drives me crazy and I have to tell him to go outside and play after a bit.

Well, this weekend while I was down south visiting my man Jacob pulled a good one.

He came out in the morning for breakfast or whatever and Danielle took one look at his calves and was pretty sure that something pretty bad was wrong with the young lad. She was ready to whisk his happy bum to the ER for further evaluation (after she called me first of course, lol). So she summonsed the young man over for a closer look-see. She could NOT believe what she discovered . . .

Jacob had not 1, not 2, not 3 pairs of socks on but FOURTEEN!! Yes, there were fourteen pairs of socks on his feet. When Danielle inquired as to why in the flip he needed to have that many pairs of socks on the reply was, "My feet were cold."

Buckle up, Jody. This is going to be a long and bumpy ride, girl.

Food for Laughter

Robbie often has friends over to spend the night. I guess it's a right of passage when you live in the Room of Doom. I pretty much just accept it because I'm at a point in my life that I just don't want to fight it anymore.

He has this one friend that always brings their little cute dog with a little cute bell on it's collar. Every morning, this individual lets the dog out of the bedroom when they know I'm in the kitchen doing my morning thing and I let the dog outside to do it's morning thing. No big deal . . . to me, at least.

Well, this weekend I guess this particular friend spent the night while I was away. Evidently Brian and Danielle were in the kitchen working away and the little doggie with the little bell was let out of the room. Danielle must have said something indicating that she thought this ritual was ridiculous so Brian decided to take action (oh-oh. You know this has to be good) . . . .

We own four dogs and Jeff and Danielle own one dog. That makes five dogs that live here full time. We also have three cats that reside here with us. With tinker bell doggie that makes a whopping SIX dogs!!! Well, Brian proceeded to load all six dogs and all three cats into Robbie's room and then quietly shut the door.

About 10 minutes later, out comes Robbie, in his boxers rubbing his eyes and sleepily stating the obvious, "All the dogs and cats are in my room." Right behind him, just like the Pied Piper, comes a parade of dogs and cats.

When this story was retold to me I was in hysterics. Later, when I was out on my run I was thinking about this visual again and just busted up laughing. I'm sure anyone that saw me running yesterday was pretty sure that I was completely daft. I probably am but this time I had a pretty good reason for the hysteria.

I/we can ALWAYS count on Brian to provide a lot of humor to counteract all the other turmoil that he creates in our home.

Trick or Sleep

I informed the twins this year that they were too old to go out trick-or-treating for Halloween. They both reluctantly took the news rather well, I thought. I was so happy to be finished with this ridiculous ritual. I've always HATED Halloween from the very depths of my soul.

Well . . . enter Brian. Fresh home from Idaho. He tells the twins that he's excited to take them out trick-or-treating this year. They tell him that Mom said "no". He jumps in the middle of my business and says, "what's wrong with you? Of course they are going out on Halloween. I'm taking them and you don't have to do anything." Hmmmm . . . that sounds pretty sweet. Okay deal!

He holds true to his promise and I proceed to enjoy my lovely quiet evening home (because in 15 years we have NEVER had a single trick-or-treater and I LOVE it!). Evidently, the story goes a bit like this . . .

Jacob is running to beat feet from one house to another. Jeff (who also went with the group) overhears a mother tell her 4 year old to not run because he might trip and fall. Right on cue, Jacob is running full speed ahead across someone's lawn and trips and does a complete face plant in the grass. Nice. He pops right back up and just keeps on going.

Courtney, after about six houses starts complaining that she's tired and wants to go home. Brian will have none of this (you see, Brian is highly motivated. He knows like he knows like he knows that Mom isn't about to let the twins have the candy so that means that him and Jeff are splitting the loot 50/50 - he's right, for the most part). He shakes Courtney off of his arm where she's hanging and begging to stop and tells her to get right back to work. She does.

When they arrive home around 9:30 Courtney can't wait to get to bed. Jacob wants to tell me all about the haunted house they visited and all the fun they had. I listen for a couple of minutes then remind him that 6:00 a.m. comes pretty dang early so he'd best be getting to bed. Off he goes. As soon as they are in bed, Jeff makes a run out to the car and comes in carrying something that resembles Santa's bag. Holy mackerel! I don't think I've EVER seen this much candy in one place. It's beyond disgusting!

The following morning as soon as the twins are safely off to school, the two go through the candy and divide it up. They did pack a few baggies of candy that the twins can have upon occasion. The rest? Well, I just don't even want to know. I'm so grossed out by all of this. The candy they gave the twins will probably last until this time next year, or beyond.

Well, we ALL agreed that this is absolutely the last flipping year that those kids of mine are going out on Halloween. So, I'd like to say, "GOOD RIDDANCE TO YOU, HALLOWEEN!"

The Dating Game

As I mentioned before, Brian is home from Idaho. As I also mentioned before, he managed to get himself into a bit of trouble while he was there. One of the consequences of said trouble is that he has no driver's license for the span of about two years. Yikes! That's a heck long time for a young man. Another consequence is that his girl of 1-1/2 years kicked his bum to the curb. I'm pretty certain he deserved it, but his heart was broken nonetheless.

Well, these two things don't seem to be slowing my boy down at this point. The downside of being home is that we live a good half hour away from town way UP in the hills. It's not a drive for the faint of heart. Our road is really scary for those who aren't familiar with it. Brian has been in town interacting with the likes of a variety of females and they all seem to be more than willing to give him a ride home at the latest hours of the night. What the heck?!?

He told me he was hanging with this one girl so I thought, "Oh, I guess this is who he's going to be dating." Then within a day or two there was another girl and then another girl and so on. I asked him about it and his response? "Mom, I'm SO not into getting into another relationship. I just want to hang out and have fun." Well . . . um . . . . okay . . .

There is a part of me that is just an old fashioned girl. A guy asks you out on a date. If he can't pay or pick me up in his car and provide an enjoyable evening, well he just isn't someone I want to be associating with. Nowadays? Yeah, these girls are pretty aggressive. So so so glad I'm married (and happily at that) and don't have to figure out this new fangled dating thing out.