Gail

My sister, Gail, and I haven’t always been close. I was the oldest and she was the youngest in our family as we were growing up. I picked on her a lot because I could. It was my right, after all, as the oldest sibling in the family!!! I was the one that seemed to be always getting into trouble. I did, however, have a partner in crime. My brother. I was his mentor in the trouble department and I trained him well. So well, in fact, that he exceeded my expectations in this area. I was a proud sister. But that is a different story.

As we have journeyed through adulthood, my sister and I have grown closer than ever. We have discovered that we have very similar personalities (which would explain why we clashed as kids). Of course, our dad has the same disposition that we do. We are a laid back group. Our other sister, brother and mom are a little more intense. We love them, nonetheless.
As it turns out, turn about is fair play. My sister and I talk on the phone at least 3 times a week. I look forward to our conversations and even get excited when I see her number on my caller I.D. So, we talked a couple of days ago and were discussing our individual businesses. She told me of how she attended a business class and was instructed to write a mission statement and an elevator speech for her business. She then challenged me to do the same. Ugh!
Today as I was traveling I decided to do my “assignment.” It’s amazing! I feel more confident and optimistic about my little business. I feel as if I finally have clarity and a direction. This is the most empowered I have felt in a long time.
Okay, I’ll say it. My sister knew best. And, yes, I love you, Gail. You are my sister AND my BFF!

Courtney

She came into my life 4-1/2 years ago, 6 years old. She was a little sunshiney, sweet girl and I was happy to accept her into our family. She has grown on me and I now think of her as "my daughter." And why shouldn't I? My husband and I adopted her AND her twin brother, Jacob.

Life didn't really give her a fair shake at first. She had a tough start and ended up in the foster care system which is not the easiest life. She faired pretty well, we thought. What amazed me was that she had been handed a raw deal and seemed to be a sweet girl in spite of it.

I'm not going to say that we haven't had bad days with Courtney, because we have. She has done her fair share of "naughties" and has had to be disciplined. She happens to be pretty lazy by nature and that just really rattles my cage. Anyone who knows me knows that I am anything but lazy!

The other day we were hiking up in the hills, her and I. We came across a beautful meadow with some huge rocks at the edge of it. It was a sunny day and she went running across the meadow with the wind blowing her pretty blonde wavy hair and yelling, "Mommy, look! Over there are some rocks. Let's go see if the Indians left holes in them!" It was a vision right out of a "Sound of Music" movie. I will not ever get that memory out of my head.

So now we have today. She is struggling with something. I don't know what it is but there are some changes that we are having trouble dealing with. Our sweet little innocent girl is reaching puberty and now the darkness from the past is here to greet her again. I know she will get through this. We are seeking outside help to ensure that she does get through this.

I am left here wondering how is it possible that people are allowed to hurt children in this way? Why is that even something that we have to deal with in our world? I have a lot of anger toward the individual/s that have done this to our child and I know that I need to let it go. I need to allow God to handle this in HIS way - justice is HIS job, not mine. My job is to love her through the storms in her little life and love her I will.

So tonight as I say my prayers, I will thank Heavenly Father for the opportunity to be able to make a difference in these two little lives that have been sent to join our family. I will also ask for the strength and wisdom to help my children weather the storms in life and grow up to be the awesome individuals that they are all capable of being.

After all . . . I am their mother!

BISCUITS!!

My husband just walked into my office and asked if we had any of those Pillsbury canned biscuits in the refrigerator. Um, no we are on a "BUDGET"! Remember??? Luxuries like canned biscuits are a thing of the PAST!!! I actuallyy felt kind of bad for him. He looked like a little kid that just had his candy taken away from him. He looked crushed!

So, being the awesome wife that I am, I suggested that I make biscuits myself. He said, "How you going to do that?" Is this a reflection on my lack of enthusiasm in the kitchen or what?

I said, "I can just make them from stuff we have in the pantry."

He replied, "You mean, from scratch? You know how to do that?"

Oh, my mother would be mortified if she were in the same room as we were just now. She would say something like, "Jody! Of course you know how to cook. You are a damn good cook. You mean to tell me that you haven't been preparing great food for your family?" Well, we aren't going to let her in on this little escapade of mine, now are we!?!?

I am now heading into the kitchen to show my family that, yes indeed, I am capable of being on a budget and making food that is palatable from our food storage. I guess this means that the secret is now out. It isn't that I CAN'T cook - I just HATE it. I hate cooking. That is all there is to it!

Damn! This budget thing is killing me!

Remaining Christlike

Today at church I had the opportunity to visit with a friend of mine that I haven't been able to see for quite awhile. I was so excited to see her and she always acts as though seeing me is one of the brightest spots in her life. I'm sure she does that to all of her friends.

We spent most of the second two hours of church talking. Probably not what I'm supposed to be doing but, friends, I can tell you I got more out of our interaction than I would have out of paying attention to the lessons that were presented. This dear friend of mine has been through the wringer. Not a bit of exaggeration here.

I asked her what's been going on in her life and she opened up to me quite frankly. She told me things that I know she hasn't shared with many. Things that would have destroyed some of the strongest of us and here she was just pushing on. Not only did she share these trials with me, but there was no hint of self-pity or longing for sympathy. As she was telling me about what's going on in her life, she made a point to tell me that her marriage was strong and she was GRATEFUL for her wonderful husband and the many good things in her life. Talk about seeing a very dry glass as half full!!! I was utterly amazed.

During the course of our conversation she made a point to, get this one, tell me that she's been thinking about me and worrying that things might not be okay with me. Let me clarify. She's concerned that the yogic world might be affecting my spirituality. I was floored! Why would someone who has more than their fair share on their plate be concerned about my spiritual health? What's even more amazing is that we haven't interacted in quite awhile so she would have NO way of knowing what's up with me - emotionally, spiritually or physically! I told her she was dead on but not to worry, I was going to be okay. My daughter has made it her mission to see to that! We both laughed.

Driving home from church, I was touched at how Christlike she was/is. Christ had so many personal challenges, yet he always showed and had love and compassion for everyone. I was humbled. It all goes back to what we have all been taught from day one. When you lose yourself in service and compassion for others, your burden is made to seem light. This lesson that I received at church today has touched my heart and I would gladly give up any organized lesson at church to receive this kind of wisdom.

Thank you, my dear friend. You are an example to me and I will strive to be more like you - more Christlike.

Party On!

It's funny how the things in life we seem to dread often turn out to be really enjoyable. Now, I'm sure there are things we dread in life where there is just no way they will turn out to be a good deal regardless of how you view them such as going to the gynocologist, dentist or disciplining a teenager. Today was one of those days where we had the twins' birthday party scheduled at the roller skating rink. I was dreading it. I hate all the chaos that goes along with kid's parties and just feel like I'm being drug to the gallows when I have to go. No exceptions.

So it is times like this where I'm looking back on the event and realize that, yes, I actually had a decent time. I was able to visit with my friend, Meredith, quite a bit. I even held her baby, Elsa, pretty much the whole time. Anyone who knows me knows how I SO don't do babies. This baby is special, for some reason. I really like this little girl. Of course, while I was holding her baby, Meredith was the party mom. She was in there giving directions to the children and snapping photos. It was great.

There was also another mom that I got to visit with that turned out to be a pleasant surprise. I visited with Noah's mom, Jen. She, too, has a child in the SDC with Jacob. We chatted about the challenges of having a special needs child and she mentioned that is wonderful to interact with someone else who is fighting the same battle. I agreed.

Often people just don't get it. They have "pity" for those of us with special needs children. Yes, we do have challenges that people with mainstream children don't. However, I don't feel sorry for myself. Actually, I consider myself richly blessed. Jacob is a loving boy who is genuinely grateful to belong to a family and be able to do the many things we do. He is perfectly content to entertain himself while other children are off running around and requiring a lot of attention. Jacob is loving and very kind to others. He genuinely cares about the well being of other people. There just are not enough people like that in the world.

So, going to this party turned out to be a wonderful experience. I had a lot of fun interacting with these two women. Meredith just enjoys getting out and having a life outside of taking care of her 6 month old twins. She was excited when I suggested that we have a party for her older twins up at our place in two weeks.

Yeah, so guess what? I'm actually doing another twin birthday party in two weeks at my place! Go figure.

Simple Life

Last night my husband came home after an "all day" visit with our financial planner. He grabbed my shoulders, looked me in the eye with all the seriousness he could muster, and said, "Honey, I have a new word for you to learn. It's a new word and it's going to be a difficult task for you to wrap your head around this new concept. You are a smart woman and I trust that you will be able to handle this incredible feat."

I looked at him skeptically and said, "Okay, give it to me. I can take it. What's up?"

He said, "Your word for this next year (or lifetime) is . . ." and then he backed away slightly to ensure that he was out of slapping range, then quietly added, "BUDGET!"

I gasped. What?!?!? I don't understand. (Of course I wouldn't understand. I've never HAD to understand, thankfully.) So, it was at that moment that I asked for clarification. What do you mean?

My sweet husband gently attempted to explain that I would have to be accountable for ALL expenses that I incurred. Wow. Not only that, we would be going through our expenditures for the last year and decipher what we can cut out and live without (I don't know about you, but I NEED everything, yes, everything I buy and spend money on).

So promptly in my head I started rolling through all the stuff I spend money on and decided that spending money was hard work! I started to realize how much more simple my life is going to be without the pressure to spend all that money! I'm kind of excited. We are going to use the food storage (that sure cuts down on the grocery bill and time spent in the grocery store), minimize the kids' activities (that would be, like, they might be home more?? Can't decide how I feel about this one), reduce the meals we eat out as a couple dating (um, yeah, I'm down with this - it might actually get my husband to be creative about our dates), and generally refrain from unnecessary and excessive frivolous expenditures (whatever THAT means - like no more random Target runs??). One thing I absolutely REFUSE to give up, though, is my yoga. Thankfully, that one got glossed over so far.

Okay, this is not sounding so bad. I actually am excited for the challenge that Mr. Weltz has extended to me and, yes, I will be victorious! I will show him. I am a going to be the budgeting fool.

So, girls, I can't go to lunch much of anymore nor can I go shopping. What I can do is go on a hike, horseback ride or hang out at your house. Oh, and yeah, I can zone your feet! That costs $40 to you and it is positive affect on my budgeting efforts!

The Three A's

As I was browsing my Facebook and reading the status of my friends, I noticed that one of my friends posted her status as:

___________ is glad that her husband is out slaying dragons for our family. I love you, honey.

I was touched by that. What a wonderful wife she is and must be to her husband. All too often we women forget to do the most simple and obvious things that make our men happy. One of the things on that very small list is to acknowledge the things he does and show appreciation for them. If more wives would adhere to the three A's, as I like to refer to them, there would be a lot more happy marriages and a lot less broken homes and families. They are:

Appreciation, Attention and Affection

In no particular order. I, for one, need a lot of reminding in this department. And, I would like to thank my friend for bringing this to my attention today.

My husband is always doing wonderful things around our place just because he enjoys making me happy. He will go down to the barn and "putz" around cleaning up the alley, discarding all the twine I throw around and then he will always load a bale of hay on the Gator for me and reload the feed. Not a lot of effort on his part but, boy, does it make my life a lot easier. I really strive to let him know that, yes, I noticed what he did and thank him for it. What I love is that he quietly does these random acts of love with no expectation of praise but I can tell that it means a lot when I notice.

So, Skip, I love you and appreciate you more than you will ever know. You are the bestest husband for me and I am so grateful that you put up with me and are willing to bring sardines (don't ask) home for me to make me happy. I am a very lucky and grateful girl. As for the attention part? Well, as a friend of mine once said, "Some things are just better left between a husband and his wife."

Enough said.